Wherein Bonnie sings a solo

I had kind of an embarrassing moment today. They called the choir up to sing in sacrament and I didn't go up because I am not in the choir. I remember watching everyone walking up there and listening to the pretty introduction. That is all I remembered until Rob nudged me ferociously telling me to stop singing. The choir was halfway through the first verse, and yes I had sung it all with them...from the audience. I am not quite sure, as all I can remember is how beautiful the music was, but Rob tells me I was raising the roof all. by. my. self.

Out of the mouth and into the archives

After pointing out some backward numbers to Brooklyn on her homework, she insisted that "the lady" told her to put them that way.

Mom: No, I really don't think she would tell you to put them that way, cause it is wrong.

Brooklyn: Oh well, that's ok, she is just a gramma lady anyway...

I love to see the temple

Temples have really been on my mind a lot lately.

*Last Saturday our Relief Society went up to SLC to see the Joseph Smith movie and the power and majesty of the Temple towering over me as I walked around the streets and buildings surrounding it was so powerful. I ached to go inside. That is one of the most amazing places to be. It was truly an edifying day for me.

*A few Sundays ago, a sister in our ward spoke on temples in Sacrament Meeting. Then the Sunday before the SLC trip, our RS president gave a powerful lesson on temples in RS.

*A blog I follow for the Kansas City Temple did a little blip (great read) on the real estate surrounding a temple. She gave a suggestion for a FHE that we did last night (see below).

*And last but not least our family has the great opportunity to go through the Draper Temple open house on Saturday and I am ecstatic. My kids are ecstatic. The thought of being able to take my children inside a temple brings me great joy. I hope it will strengthen their testimony of temples as it did mine when I had the opportunity to go through the Manti Temple open house and dedication when I was young. In preparation for this day I did a FHE last night that I hope will also strengthen their testimonies.

I picked up some pics of the temple at the distribution center and bought some frames before hand. Before FHE I gathered a hammer and nails. In the FHE we talked about the building of temples and how even building a temple is a sacred thing. We talked about the effect the temple has on an area surrounding it, how the price of homes go up and most important how it has an effect on an individual who gets to see it daily from living close or driving by each day. We talked about the blessing we have of getting to see a handful of temples by driving a very short distance. Then I told them I wanted them to think of a way that we could wake up and see the temple each morning. As the answer came that I was looking for of putting a picture of the temple in our rooms, I told them I wanted them to be thinking of the perfect place for their temple as we would be "building" a temple in their room. It had to be somewhere special that would bring value to the other things in their room, a place they would be able to see it each day. We then put the pictures of the temple in the frames and each person went to their room and found their place. It was fun to see them rearrange things in their room to create the perfect place. Rob and I even put my temple picture up in our room. It took a little planning to find the perfect place, but what a great sight when I woke up this morning and saw that beautiful sight. I LOVE to see the temple.

In closing (since this turned more formal than I am used to :}) I want to share some things from D&C 109 that a great bishop once shared with me about the amazing spiritual blessings that come from attending the temple. This was revelation given to Joseph Smith as he was giving the dedicatory prayer for the Kirtland Temple. The whole thing was powerful, but these are a few promises that I picked out that really gave me some hope.

*13...That all people who shall enter upon the threshold of the Lord's house may feel thy power, and feel constrained to acknowledge that thou hast sanctified it, and that it is thy house, a place of thy holiness.

*22...That thy servants may go forth from this house armed with thy power, and that thy name may be upon them and thy glory be round about them and thine angels have charge over them.

*26: That no combination of wickedness shall have power to rise up and prevail over thy people upon whom thy name shall be in this house.

Now who couldn't use a little more power against the enemy. I find great comfort in those promises. I believe in God and I believe in His promises. I would also like to extend that promise to you. If you are able to go to the temple, do it often. If you aren't, do whatever it takes to go and be there. I promise that your life will be easier to manage and that you will find the strength to overcome any personal battles that threaten to destroy you. I love each of you so much!

Rock and a Hard Place

Thanks for all of your congrats everyone. It was a real victory indeed. Now I have a decision to make. You remember that company I got on and tested for out of anger frustration at my company. It is a company that Abby's mom works for and she loves it. They have been really good to refer me to it. Well, the company is interested in taking the hiring process to the next step...normally I would be elated and I have given myself a pat on the back as it really is very hard to get on with any MT company with the amount of experience that I have. I didn't think I even had a chance. It is supposed to be a really good company that has oodles of work all the time (my only beef with my current company now is that the work is very sporadic and I am left working very odd hours, not a good thing for someone who likes a schedule). So, here is the dilemma...

I HATE CHANGE! I AM SCARED TO DEATH OF TRYING SOMETHING NEW AND MOST IMPORTANT WILL I BE SORRY?!?!!?

So here is the question for you...

A) Should I leave well enough alone?
B) Am I crazy not to take the new job? (I like to think that I have it in the bag if I want it, when really I still have more of the hiring process to go through. I think a vain part of me wants to know if I am good enough.)

While you chew on that here is a synopsis of my prayer last week after I tested and before I knew I was going to get the raise I asked for...

"...I have a problem, this is what I have done to try to make it better, this is what I would really like to see happen (staying with my current company after they give me a raise and magically produce much more work because I hate change and I am a scaredy cat), I am leaving it in your hands."

I am not used to my prayers being answered in the affirmative (for the past too long they seemed to be "no not now, not at all, no, no, no," and now I don't know what to do with myself when He says yes to both of them...

Why do I have to be such an agonizer? It really drives Rob crazy.

You raise me high!

If you have been around me the last few days you probably have not been enjoying life! I have been a bear and rightly so. I got an email from work on Monday that put me in the dumps. Let me give some background...

November 2008: I get an email from some person I don't know welcoming me to the new company telling me to sign the info and work handbook and send it back. What? A few emails later I find out that my work just merged and that it was "going to be a good thing." We would be getting benefits and everyone would be up for review in January for a raise.

That was a very stressful thing for me. You would not have wanted to be around me those few days either. I don't handle change very well. My anxiety goes through the roof.

January 2009: I get an email from work with our new pay rates. This is what I read (in a nutshell as the real email is confidential):

You are getting a pay cut.

Um what?

I send an email back inquiring why. I waited ALL day for a response! I was even nice in the email. I was so mad I could not even work (it was my day off, but I had planned on working anyway). That is how dysfunctional I get. I could not stop wondering why; if I was just doing really bad work or if they were just trying to get rid of old employees so they could bring in their own. I was furious. I IM'd my supervisor and she could not tell me anything. She didn't know either. I get an email later that day and it was addressed to all the employees that says this (in a nutshell again):

In order for us to provide everyone the benefits, we are cutting pay across the board to help pay for them....

Now just let that digest for a minute...after I let it digest I turned into a Bonnie that not many of you know. And I sent an email that says this (in no nutshell at all. Please forgive me now for ruining your perfect image of me):

I have never heard of such a thing. That should be an added bonus and not something taken away from us. I will not be taking advantage of the insurance and would rather have my previous rate besides looking forward to rate increases that were supposedly supposed to happen. I was told that I would be up for a raise in January. I would ask you to reconsider my rate change due to my not taking insurance and I would still like to see the raise I am due for.

I was told just this week that it is easier to be mean when you are not doing it face to face and I am here to say that yes it is. If I had been face to face or even on the phone it might have been something more like this:

I do bow to you oh holy one. Whatever you want to do to me, you may...

I felt like a sinner pushing the send button on that email. I was so sure that I was not going to have a job after all that that I actually tested for another company yesterday. But I didn't care. I was MAD! Well I never heard anything back from work and was not counting on it until today. I got an email just a bit ago and this is what it said:

Bonnie, I did get you approved for the raise you were promised. I have attached the revised letter for you. Hope this works better for you.

And it does, very much so thank you...(this is where I might have sent that oh-holy-one-I-bow-to-you email).

Can't decide if I am more excited about the raise or the fact that I AM VICTORIOUS! I won't even think about how I could be the ruin of the company because now they will not be able to afford to pay their employees and give them benefits too. Ok, I am done. I will take all your congrats in the form of comments.

P. S. I am considering doing seminars on getting raises out of hopeless situations. Tell me what you think...

P.S.S. Danessa tell Dave to be ready. I have been schooling Rob, it is about time...

Me and Moses could have been great buddies.

Do you remember how I did this post on time and how I didn't think I had enough of it? and then how I got called to the scouts and really wondered if my family was going to survive one more event that was going to take me away from them? Me too. And now I know that God must have a sense of humor because he took me out of scouts and put me as second counselor in the R.S. It was kind of funny, but I was not laughing.

Now if you are not familiar with that position, it requires conducting and public teaching. That is right. ME teaching a bunch of women. It has only happened once and if I recall, it was not such a great experience. You see, I am one who pictures myself getting up in front of everyone and in a sing-song way eloquently teaching the things of the spirit in such a way that laughter and tears flow in the audience and everyone leaves the class with a lightness to their step and nobody can wait until I teach again. I can see myself with confidence and determination as I try to instill into their hearts that they are daughters of God and that he loves them. You know those kind of teachers that I am talking about right. But instead when I get up I blubbler and boob and my mind goes blank! All those thoughts of sharing my deepest love and concern for them comes out in mumbo jumbo and they are all like WHAT? You know those kind too right?

As I accepted the call, I thought about Moses and I recalled that he too worried about the same thing. He was slow of speech. The words did not come easily for him.

Homemade Christmas

The long awaited post. Sorry everyone...

Among the MANY other things the kids got this Christmas, here are the things that were the best part of Christmas this year, mainly because the kids put so much time into making them.

These bows are so fun and easy and thanks to Danessa (who happens to be a great new friend who was so good to help welcome me into the ward) we were able to make oodles of them. I think every little girl (and big girl)needs one in here hair, maybe that is why I can't help myself from giving them away.

This was one of my favorite projects. I kind of got carried away with these darling things. I now have a great supply of beads and things if anyone wants to come hang out and make some. (For future reference to my sisters who do photography, a pajama'd knee makes a great backdrop for just about anything.)

After taking 3 years of sewing and having a mother and sisters who make marvelous things with a sewing machine, this is all I dared attempt to make. I tell you they were FUN stuff. I might attempt something more daring next time.

These things were actually quite a surprise. My darling little man spent countless hours at his Grandpa Smiths to make these things. The shelf pictured above is mine and he made 3 others for each of his sisters. I have to say that I LOVE the coat hanger too. Somehow the coats stay more organized on it.

Jordan was a little more self reliant than the others and planned out these darling little projects. She scrap-booked journals for each person with darling little pens to match (not pictured above. In my quest to get pics of all these projects, there were things that I could not find, mainly the rest of the journals.) Didn't she do awesome?

I had fun doing these little tutus. I had seen them around and never thought I could make one. My kids love them and I am not sure why I don't have any pics of them in them.

Rob wanted in on the action too. He helped the little girls make something for Brandon as he probably would not have appreciated any jewelry or flowers that they were making. The above contraption if you have not ever seen one is a marshmallow gun made out of PVC pipe. They are quite fun and should be banned from any home unless they come from a homemade Christmas. The marshmallows are no fun to pick out from the carpet. They are found everywhere. They do make a great outdoor activity though.

This year was by far our favorite. It really got me wondering if next year we could really pull off a total and complete homemade Christmas.