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Monday, April 5, 2010

Private reflections-I had a bad day...

Just gonna vent for a minute, but stay tuned, there is a happy ending. (Probably in 2010?)

I have been having a tough time with work.

Since I got my new account back in September, it has been stressful. I left an amazing supervisor and an amazing account and got a so-so account and a tough supervisor. I would use the words impersonal and tart to describe her, which isn't all that bad, but you know, it has just been tough. Did I already say that? When you don't ever get much positive feedback, it doesn't feel very rewarding. Well last night was the straw that broke the camel's back. I won't bore you with the details, but in the aftermath, I went to bed crying and vowed to quite and go find another job. After I calmed down, I just told Heavenly Father that I know we can't make it without this job, but I just could not. go. on. anymore. You know those times. Then a thought came to me. Heavenly Father made it possible for me to have this great job that I can do at home. He put into motion all that had to happen so I could help support this family when the time came. If he could do that, then he could help me through this, right? But how? Learning a new account takes a lot of time and I basically don't make much money in the process. I decided it was a long shot, but I would check with my old supervisor about my old account, and wouldn't you know it, she said the account is drowning with work and she would be elated to have me back. She made me feel like the most important person in her life, just like before. I broke down crying again. Of course she couldn't hear me through Yahoo messenger, so I didn't feel so embarrassed. She said the account is ready for me anytime. Now I am in the process of trying to explain to my supervisor why I would want to leave my current account. She doesn't think I am serious about leaving. They are rethinking their denial of my request for a raise last week. I am not sure at this point it would persuade me. I will update as I am sure this will take the rest of the day to get worked out. But there is hope...

UPDATE many years later in 2018:  I didn't get to go back to my old account and actually got in trouble for contacting my old supervisor.  I put my big girl panties on and somehow continued to work on this account, and it even got bearable.  In 2015, after the workload seemed so sporadic that I was working very unpredictable hours, just to get my hours in, I made the decision to quit and I did daycare full time.  I am still so grateful to this day for the opportunity to work from home, while my kids needed me here.

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