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Friday, May 16, 2008

Do not call me, I'll call you!

Warning this post will reveal a real mean side of me so if you do not want your image of me tainted please skip this post.

Ok, you asked for it.

For the purpose of as little confusion as possible, I have color coded my post. Proceed with the below code to help you...

My thoughts will be in red.
Automated recordings will be in green.
Operator will be in orange.
My actual voice will be in purple.
Narrator will be in black


RRRiiiingg! RRiiinnngg! RRRiiinnngg!

Hello?

Hi! This is Mark from the satellite TV company. We have a free satellite system just for you! Yahdah yahdah yahdah! Press 1 now to talk to a live operator who can help you right away or press 9 to be taken off our list.


Pressing 9 (that is a fingerprint)

CLICK! (as in rudely hanging up on you and NOT taking you off their list!)

2 hours later...

RRRiiinnngg! RRRiiinnnggg! RRRiiinngg!

Caller ID: 1-702-520-1391 (Oh! man! Why won't they just leave me alone?)

(In my very annoyed-that-you-interrupted-me voice)

Hello?


Hi! This is Mark from the satellite TV company. We have a free satellite system just for you! Yahdah yahdah yahdah! Press 1 now to talk to a live operator who can help you right away or press 9 to be taken off our list.

Hi! Would you like to know how you ca...

NO! I would like to be tak...

CLICK!

How RUDE!

And this goes on day in and day out. I am sure you all agree that there is nothing more annoying than to be interupted from a great nap, or to jump up during dinner, or during one on one time with the young ones, or as is the case with me now, while I am WORKING!

Yesterday I had had ENOUGH! I got on Google (you gotta love those guys, whoever they are!) and typed in "Hi! This is Mark from the satellite TV Company..." and I got some great advice from other frustrated victims of Mark.



Have you ever wondered what "Mark" looks like. I think this must be it.



This is where caller ID comes in. I was told to call them back...



"Hi! If you would like to learn more about how you can save a million dollars (or something like that) on your bills every month through debt consolitdation (where in THE heck did that come from? I thought I was calling about a free satellite TV!) then stay on the line to talk to a customer care agent now, or press 9 to be taken off our list. Uh Uh, I am NOT falling for that one again, I'll wait thank you. I think I WOULD really like to talk to the customer care agent.

Hi! would you like to he...

No I would like to be tak...

CLICK!

Oh that's ok. I have some time on my hands (not really, but for you I think I can find all the time that it takes!)


Calling back

"Hi! If you would like to learn more about how you can save a million dollars (or something like that) on your bills every month through debt consolitdation then stay on the line to talk to a customer care agent now, or press 9 to be taken off our list." Once again, I think I'll hold thanks!


(With a little bit of annoyance) Hi, would you like...

Nope! I would lik...

CLICK!


Same message. I'll wait, thanks!

(At this point I am feeling a little bit of victory as I hear the defeat in her voice.)

Hi, would you li...

No! I want you to take my NUMBER OFF OF YOUR LIST! Wow did I just get all of that in there?

Ok. We are taking you off of our list.

Tha...

CLICK.

Aaaahhh. Much better! Now I can go back to work.

2 hours later...

RRRRiiiiiinggg! RRRiiiinnngg! RRRiiinngg!

Caller ID: 1-702-520-1391.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?!

Hello?

"Hi if you would like to learn how you can save a million dollars (at least they didn't try to trick me that they were the satellite company) then stay on the line.... (the livid voice in my head) Oh I will thanks.

Hi, would you like to ...

NO! I would like...

CLICK.

OK I am getting really tired of being HUNG UP on!

I went through the whole thing again. It took me about 3 times until they said they would take me off the list before they hung up on me again, but that didn't stop me from calling again.

Hi would...

NO! I want you to take me off of your list and I want to know that you are REALLY going to this time.

Ok.

Click!

CALLING AGAIN

This time another person answers.

Hi...

I WANT you to take this numb...

Mam we need to know what number you are calling from so we can take you off our list. If you wouldn't have kept hanging UP on me I could have given it to you the VERY first time you called so that you didn't have to pay your employees for all of this time I have so successfully waisted on both of our accounts!

NO problem it is _____ and I have this number listed with the Do-not-call-registry- and if you call back I WILL report you.

Ok we have removed you off of our list. You will not get a call back.

Thank you.

Goodbye.

Goodbye.

and then... click.

Now if they had just listened to me the first time!

So....
That is how it is done.

Going back and re-reading as many times as necessary to clear up any confusion is encouraged.

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi! This is Mark from the satellite TV company. We have a free satellite system just for you! Press 1 now to talk to a live operator who can help you right away or press 9 to be taken off our list.

Abby said...

You sure showed Mark! I bet he is home cowering in his closet. Nobody messes with people from Mona!!

Perfect Moments Photography said...

I love seeing people give them crap back when they just don't leave you alone! Way to stand up for yourself girl!!!!

Bonnie said...

Anonymous it sounds like Mark needs your number too!

P.S. The auto warranty people are going to get it next!

Doesn't anyone else seem to have this problem or is it just me?

Tamster said...

Not that I don't ever have similar problems, but that REALLY sounded extreme!!! How ANNOYING!!! I think I would be pretty darn frustrated, too. I would want to report them long before then, but I'm not sure what good that would do either. So dumb and rude of them! I am glad you got it resolved FINALLY!!! :-)

And to Mark: B'bye!!! Click!

Bonnie said...

I know this sounds extreme, but I PROMISE I did not exaggerate any of it. This company even piggybacked, if you will, off of a disconnected local number. They are getting too smart. I wonder if this will really be the end of it or not.

I am trying to get rid of all those telemarketers for you M&D. This number has been around I am sure.

Here at home said...

You should just let Boo answer next time and ask them if they want to buy some of her homemade poop.

Here at home said...

you know, when I first started reading this, I thought you were trying to tell us not to call you anymore because you are so busy with work and we're always interupting you. :)
Stupid telemarketers.

Tamster said...

Bon, I wasn't trying to accuse you of exaggerating; I was just emphasizing how extreme their calling was.

I like Sharebear's idea! ;-)

HuckFinnsMom said...

Is there something I don't know about homemade poop?

Wendoyoublog in Colorado said...

PiP, its a good thing you did that comment anonymously, so that BonBon won't give out your number.....

Woops.

I want some homemade po*p...NOT!!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

thank you, thank you, thank you - that's one less telemarketer we will have to deal with when we get home - there is not even a human voice I can sing "Love at Home" to when it is only a recording. Love WoW

Bonnie said...

Love at home! That is great.

As of today I have not heard back from Mark. Now if the Auto warranty people would just call...

Bonnie said...

Unfortunately I have bad news to report. I spoke to soon. Mark has called back. Not once. Not twice. I lost count but it is more than three times. And they are getting sneakier. Today they called with a number that I could not call back. I have resorted to spending an hour online filling out a report on them. Hope I can find some relief. I am seriously thinking about a suit! I have never known a company to nerving.

Anyway, just thought I would give an update.

Cindy said...

Bon! I think you were amazingly patient! WOW... I would have been beyond livid! Great job sticking to it until it was REALLY taken care of!

Cindy said...

Holy cow! You have got to be kidding that they called back! That is so wrong!

Shaney said...

Boy I thought my telemarketers were pushy! I hope that I can avoid Mark and the auto warrenty people. We switched our numbers and gave our fax number out as our home number and hooked the fax into the regular phone line. That line gets alot of calls but all they ever get is a very annoying beeping and fax noise:) I know I am pretty sneaky!