Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Brooklyn funnies for today

Brooklyn was walking past Jack (name has been changed to prevent further humiliation) as he was passing gas. She said, "Yooooou FARTED! Excuuuuuuuse YOU!"

And last but surely not least...

Brooklyn must have an obsession with noses, because she inquired as to why moms and dads have hair in their nose.

My first reaction was one of shock. "ME?!?!? MY nose hair is not visible is it?"

Brooklyn: "Yep!. WHY do grownups have hair in their nose?" Trying to hide the damage to my pride and knowing that this child has a problem with eating her boogers, I took this perfect teaching opportunity and I didn't hold anything back.

Me: "Well, we ALL have hair in our noses to catch all the dirt, grime, germs and nasties in the air so it doesn't get into our bodies. And then YOU go and pick those boogers and EAT them. Gross!!!"

She let out a nervous laugh and turned green. I was sure I had cured her of her appetite for the waste in her nose, until later...but I'll spare you the details.

WHAT am I to DO?!?!?

Dr. Dirk, is there a cure for this disease? Is there a surgery to remove the offending digit/s? Are there adverse effects to shaving all her nose hairs, so as to stop the booger forming process?

Dr. Paul, can I tell her that she will go blind if this nastiness continues? Is it wrong to scare her into stopping?

Please tell me what would have worked for any of you (if you would have had a booger eater).


PIP a.k.a. Pineapple Princess said...

Tell her that all the big people with hair in their noses ate their boogers as children. The thicker and longer, the more they indulged. For the record, I have no nose hair, so you can use me as an example.

sharbear said...

Ask her if she likes eating the nose hairs in her boogers.

shellbell said...

Oh my heavens PiP, that one got a good laugh. I just hope if Bonnie tells her that, she doesnt go around asking all people with hair in their noses if they ate their boogers as children. Maybe she could do it politely, "You ate your boogers! Excuuuuuuuuuuse you!"

shellbell said...

Maybe you could tell her if she eats her boogers, the number 3 on her nose will turn into a number 4.

BonBon said...

Pip, maybe we need to have Brooklyn inspect your nose a little closer for any hairs, for I surely believed I was free of them too! I guess since you don't have any hairs, you probably don't have boogers either, so if I shaved all of Boo's nose hairs, we could solve the problem altogether? And there really is no adverse effects to doing this?

I'm still leaning toward the surgery to remove any tools that would help her get to those boogers.

Ok this is a gross post! I will try to do another one soon cause I think I am scaring all my readers away!

Brooklyn will never forgive me someday for giving her a bad start in life! Sorry everyone! Despite her taste for the disgusting, she is perfect in every other way!

JerBear & Co. said...

Despite her "taste" for the disgusting--no pun intended, right?!
Shellbell, you really got me laughing, and I thought I was already laughing from PiP and Sharbear's comments.
Bonbon, yes, this is gross, but sometimes it is necessary to discuss gross things in order to help one another through difficult times, or in order to learn.
So we will all just excuuuuuuuuse you for being gross! ;-)
And for what it's worth, I don't think it has scared anyone away, which might be even scarier to think about than this post--the fact that we're not scared away by it.
Now, to answer your question, if I were to have booger-eaters, which of course I do not (make no reference to previous comments on previous posts of someone's in which the contrary was stated), I would have no clue what to do either other than to just tell 'em it's gross and not to do it and try to catch 'em in the act to stop them and hope they eventually get it and quit, like I would have had I been one myself as a child, which of course I was not.
Good luck! :-) Tami

sharbear said...

Gosh, bon, I remember when Mom told me what boogers were made of, it cured my habit (okay, yes, i'll admit, I had that disgusting habit, too along with the rest of you. Don't try to deny it, either). I don't know what Brooklyn's problem is. Sounds pretty hopeless to me.