Sunday, January 10, 2010

Bedtime Story

Our current bedtime story of choice...

Alexis got it for Christmas. When I saw it in the bookstore, I could not resist. I remember sitting mesmerized with this story in grade school as my teacher read it each day. It is great to see my kids loving it as well.

Speaking of bedtime, if your household resembles mine, you must know there are nights where patience is a thing of the past, charity never faileth fails and bedtime cannot come soon enough. After the hundreth time of getting up for one more drink, or one more hug and kiss, the promise of a chore will usually keep my kiddos in their beds.

Restless kid 1: Buuuuuut MOOOOM! I am thirsty.

Mom: You already had a drink, 3 to be exact.

Restless kid 1: But it wasn't enough. PAAAALEAAAASE.

Mom: Go right ahead, but unload the dishwasher while you're up.

Sometimes they're desperate and sometimes they're not...

Keeping them in bed is usually not as difficult as getting them there. If you you despise this nightly ritual as much as me, I am hoping you will not judge me too harshly for some of my get-the-kids-to-bed techniques.

Bribery... "if you can be in bed with your teeth brushed and flossed, pottied, jammied, bedtime drink, hugs, kisses and prayers (makes me fatigued just writing about it, no wonder they fall to the ground in tears, kicking and thrashing about as if their world has just ended) in 15 minutes then we can read a chapter from our book... and for a bonus...if you can pull this feat off in 10 minutes, I will read until you beg me to stop!"

A good ole challenge...If that doesn't do the trick, you might hear me someone holler out, "last one in bed is a rotten egg!!!" The bedtime tantrum mentioned above has nothing on the rat race of all rate races that this one simple challenge generates as they each scurry down the hall, pushing, pulling and shoving to be the ones saved from THAT title, but hey, it works like a charm. Of course, then I have to lovingly pull the unfortunate rotten egg into my lap and love her and rock her and wipe her tears all the while trying to calm her poor little self, promising that she really isn't a rotten egg and that she beat dad so HE must be the real rotten egg. The sniffles then turn into giggles as the Rotten Egg's baby climbs down out of my lap and runs down the hall setting the record straight and hoping to be welcomed into the circle of victors.

The "hearing aid"...I am sure you have heard tales of the "hearing aid" used at the Gooche's house. It took on many forms, usually Dad's belt, or a wooden spoon, or a willow stick, but mostly anything close enough to grab. It was RARELY put to physical use. Usually it only took "hearing" the dreaded warning, before we were up and out of range of the lesson that object could teach. My kids must have inherited my fear of the thing because their hearing becomes all too keen with the mention of the "hearing aid."

To ease my own conscience, I have a fund set up in any of my children's names for their future psychotherapy needs. Feel free to donate to any or all.


Tina Williams said...

This happens at your house too? I have never heard of a "hearing aid" but it may be adapted shortly at the house on the east. My children don't do bed well either. Taylei has been in bed for less than 10 minutes and it is 11:10 pm . . . what a wolf pack we have.

Alexis said...

The hearing aid. hehe Bedtime runs pretty smoothly here... most nights that is. We have a routine and that helps. There are the occasional nights when one or all the kids are out of bed for 3 and 4 drinks, extra loves and whatever else. I figure they just aren't tired enough so I do my best to help. Oh how much I love jumping jacks! muahahaha

Here at home said...

Oh, the memories. We used to have a great going to bed routine. We need to get back to reading stories and singing like we used to.