Private reflections -service

Giving is living the Angel said.
Go feed the hungry sweet charity's bread.
And must I keep giving and giving some more,
my querulous question ran.
Uh, no said the Angel, his eyes pierced me through.
Just give till the Master stops giving to you.

A few years back I read a quote on the bulletin by my bishop's office. I wish I had written it down for I only remember it in a nutshell. It said that charity was not only meant to teach the giver to give, but the receiver to receive.

I have been feeling the need to take inventory of myself and what type of servant I have been for my Heavenly Father to all those around me. I have been blessed with many great examples that have crossed my path (I am sure not by coincidence) to help lift me up through some of the toughest times in my life. Even though I do my duty to my family, help a little here and help a little there, I had a realization hit me pretty hard, smack in the face it seemed, not so long ago.

I. need. to. do. more. But how? Serving takes time. This busy old world has made sure I don't have much of that to throw around. Serving takes money. No comment. Serving takes foresight, being in tune to the spirit. I can work on that. Serving takes selflessness. No comment. I could go on. Serving takes confidence. "What could I possibly have to offer them?"(I think this is my biggest one.) My point is...I have a lot to work on.

How do I pull myself out of my own little world and really see the rest of the world through Christ's eyes? How can I be more like the multitude of people sent into my life to lift and help me up through the toughest times of my life, for they were definitely NOT in short supply and each person was more Christlike than anyone I have ever known. I am grateful they didn't use all my excuses to keep them from reaching out to me. What is so frightening about asserting myself more for the benefit of others? I am generally not a pushy person. "Can I help with anything?" "No." "Okay," and even though I would have loved to help and I know they would love the help, I cannot bring myself to push for it.

Even now, I realize I cannot sit back and wait for Heavenly Father to bless me with each of these attributes before I can be a better servant for him. I will start by praying for opportunities and and the confidence to do them.